Relief Society General Meeting

The LDS General Conference is coming up this next weekend. I am so excited! I get to hear from prophets and apostles of the Lord. I get to hear modern day revelation of what I need to do in order to make my life closer to the way the Lord would want me to live. Since General Conference is this weekend, tonight was the General Relief Society Meeting.

Now, I'll be honest,  I have had my problems with Relief Society. I have been hurt by girls. Sometimes we don't really get along. But I have really tried my best to work on allowing myself to become close to girls and really embrace Relief Society. So tonight, I was so happy to hear from leaders of the church. There was such a beautiful spirit there. Heavenly Father definitely has a special place in his heart for women and we are so blessed. I'm so happy to be where I am in life and to have the gospel to rely on. I don't know where I would be without it. I'm even grateful for the Relief Society and the blessings it can bring to my life.

These women are truly called of God and these are my role models. I want to be as close to the spirit as these ladies. If I can make an impact to one person I will be so happy and proud of myself. I'm so glad there are women like this in the world that I can look up to.

Life is Hard

I have had a really hard week. I'm not really sure why either. I just woke up one day and was really sad. I don't know what was wrong, but I just couldn't pull myself out of this deep hole that I had found myself in. I just want to tell you. It was not fun. I felt alone, sad, and scared.

Luckily, I have amazing people in my life that are in tune with the spirit and know just how to help me. First, I was in New Testament institute class and we talked about Jesus healing the sick. We talked about how there isn't much of a need for the lepers and those with palsy to be healed in our time, but that we have all felt sadness, depression, helplessness, unworthy, and many other unpleasant feelings. Those who feel that, need Christ. And if he can make a man with palsy walk again, he can surely cure any of the things that we feel today. That gave me a lot of perspective. Then I had one of my favorite people text me and just tell me they were thinking about me. This made feel loved and that Christ knew who to prompt that would make me feel better. I also have felt pretty alone and like I don't have any friends that live around me. Today when I walked into institute I was early so I just sat down in a chair and started finding things to occupy my time, and this girl I have talked to maybe once before came and sat by me and made me feel like I had some time of relationship with her.

Heavenly Father knows our weaknesses and our insecurities. He knows everything we feel. He knows our hearts. He can send us tender mercies so that we can fell of His love. I have felt so many of those this past week. With people who have talked to me and showed me their love, but also with dreams I have had and the words that have been shared with me. I'm so grateful for the tender mercies that have been sent to me. I love my Heavenly Father and don't know where I would be without Him.

Hope, Happiness and Heart

I know I just blogged, but my heart is so full and I have to write some things down. First of all, in my ward yesterday we had ward conference. It was such a wonderful opportunity to sustain all the church leaders and to also hear from my stake leaders. I was really impressed with what our stake president had to say in Sacrament Meeting.

He started off by telling us that life isn't fair. Don't we all learn this when we are still really young? Life isn't fair at all. It's not fair that I had to meet the person I want to marry before his mission and now I have to be without him for a while. That's not fair, but I'm happy to go through this because I have learned so much and have been blessed above and beyond what I could have ever expected. He then taught us about hope. Hope means that we have faith that the Lord is going to make it all fair in the next life. We just have to have that hope and everything is going to be okay for us. We will be a lot happier not worrying about making our lives fair and just living our lives the way we know we need to. He ended by extending us all a challenge. He asked that as we said our nightly prayers to just ask Him two questions. First, do you love me? He then asked us to just sit and listen. Wait to feel that answer. Then to ask the second question, will you take care of me? I promise that as you take this challenge you will feel a spirit of love and hope come over you and you will no longer doubt.

In Sunday school we had a panel discussion and a good portion of the time we talked about our priorities. What our priorities should be and also how we can manage them all. And a lot of the advice that was given was to live every day to the fullest. We should enjoy every minute of life because it goes by so fast and I know that I don't want to lose a single second of it.

Then, today is Pday! Hurray! We all love pdays because we get to hear from our missionaries. I told Jeffrey about all the things I heard in church and how they touched me and how I am trying to make a choice to be happier and to have that hope. I think he was a little surprised about happy I was, but he had a lot of great advice for me and it was so great. I love hearing from him and being able to share in the gospel with him.

I have eight and a half months before he gets home. The advice I have for other missionary girlfriends is not to procrastinate making any changes that you wanted to make. If you wanted to become more consistent in your scripture study do it NOW. Time starts picking up and you get busy with school and work and family and the next thing you know you only have eight months left and still want to lose 10 pounds and have a stronger relationship with your Heavenly Father. I know that it can be really hard to deal with obstacles without the person you rely on most, but Heavenly Father is there for you and he blesses those who support His servants. He loves you and wants you to succeed and be happy. Turn to him for help and your journey will be a great one. You are all so strong and beautiful. Keep your hope and never doubt. :)

Waiting For My Happily Ever After

I don't really know what I want to write, but I feel like I need to let my creative juices flow, and what better way to do that than write a blog post?

Recently I had the opportunity to visit the Brigham City, Utah LDS Temple open house. What a beautiful temple. It was such a learning experience to be able to see all of the temple and really come closer to my Savior because of that experience.

My favorite part of the tour was the opportunity to see the Sealing room and the Celestial room. Both of these rooms are absolutely gorgeous. As soon as I walked into the sealing room, I could feel a very special spirit testifying to me that families really can be together forever. And someday I will be able to go there and make such sacred covenants in order to be sealed to my future family. I am so excited for that day. I just loved the Celestial room for the beauty and for also the quiet spirit that was whispering the teachings of the church are true. The temples of the church have such a strong spirit. I love to visit there and can't wait for the time that I will be able to be more involved.

Also, recently I have been thinking a lot about waiting for a missionary. As this is something I am doing, it is very pertinent to my life. Jeffrey has just under 9 months until he comes home from serving in the mission field. I miss him so much, but I wouldn't have it any other way. It is crazy to think that just a few months ago I was questioning the waiting thing. I wanted something here and now. I am so glad I have been able to exercise my patience and continue my journey with him. I know he is the best thing that has ever happened to me and I will never find another man like him.I must have gone temporarily insane to think that I would find something better out there. I have completely rededicated myself to being a full fledged missionary girlfriend.

I have come up with a few positives over the past 15 months, however.

Top 6 Reasons why Waiting is a Great Thing

• Everyone works better with a deadline! 
• Waiting has given me a timeline on when I should be prepared for marriage. It is so nice to know a time, not just a "someday." 
• Handwritten letters are romantic. 
• I know some people write love notes to each other, but how many couples write letters back and forth for two years? Not many. And I can look back and see how much we have grown together through time. 
• I definitely don't feel like I am rushing through anything. 
• Waiting for two years just to see the person I love, is definitely not one of those crazy Mormon stories where they meet and are married in 2 weeks. I get to take my time and know for sure that this is the person I want to be with. 
• I get two years, growing with someone and loving someone, without the distractions of a relationship.
• I get to focus on school and my growth! I am getting closer to the end goal of marriage and family, but I get to focus on me. 
• I get to have spiritual experiences with my boy all the time! 
• A mission is usually a man's peak of spirituality. I feel so blessed to know Jeffrey at this time and get to experience this spiritual growth with him. 
• It gives you a reason to not go on dates. 
• Let's face it, sometimes dating isn't fun. Sometimes the guy isn't your type, or you would rather stay home and watch 12 episodes of The Office in a night. What better excuse than "I already have a boyfriend"? 

These have been ways I can stay positive when I miss Jeffrey. Waiting is definitely not easy and I don't recommend it to anyone who isn't absolutely sure about what they want. It takes an emotional toll on you and sometimes you want to give up, but I promise the blessings that come from it are real and countless. Heavenly Father shows His love for those who are supporting His servants. 

I know the gospel is true and that Christ lives. He is real and He loves us and atoned for all of our sins. I wouldn't be where I am without Him. I am infinitely grateful for all He has given me and the opportunity I have to live the life that I do live.